My first Fathers Day was an amazing day, no doubt about that. It was a little surreal, being the first one and all. It was kind of how birthday’s are, you’re excited about the day as it approaches and then when the day comes you wake up expecting to ‘feel’ a little older or different. There was no physical difference, I didn’t look any different. I defintely had some amazing feelings and revelations yesterday. I was certainly treated very special, as if I had been father of the year or something or had been doing this thing for eons. Josh seemed to be more cuddly with me. Jess was very loving to me. They both wrote nice cards to me and got me cool gifts. Jess made me a banging diner. She did all the chores (she does most of them anyway
). All well and good, very much appreciated. At times I didn’t even feel worthy of it, that’s how special it was made for me!
What Fathers day really meant to me was this… I am a guy who has the most amazing responsibility: To raise a baby into a boy into a man. To teach him about life the best I can. To love him with all the unconditional love I can muster up. To earn his trust and never do anything to violate that trust. To be his friend. To be honest with him. To guide him in his decisions. To always provide for his every need. And, to teach him that Apple computers are far superior than any PC and that there is no substitute for Poorsche.
Yesterday was more of a revelation to me than anything. Yea, sure, seeing Josh be delivered was real, cutting the cord was real, taking him home was real, changing him and feeding him is very real, his cries are real, but yesterday made it all that much more real. When there’s actually a day that you are celebrated, that’s real shit. What’s weird is, I’ve only been doing this a month now, and already I get celebrated. It’s a shame we missed mothers day by a few weeks!
I also act as a father to Bosco and try and love him the same (when he’s not eating his poop) and as a result of that , I took him on a nice walk yesterday. On the walk I realized, again, just how amazing my life is. Just how blessed I’ve been and how grateful I am for it all. I’ve really arrived now, or so I think. What more can a guy ask for once he’s got a full family? We can add more kids (God willing), but really, with the exception of maybe a Porsche, I’ve really got it all.
Josh is really growing up, for get about his amazing lyrical talents (as demonstrated by his poem below), he’s changing so much every day! He’s making tons of eye contact, following our movement, checking things out, and just being cuter and cuter each day! Yesterday he was reaching up and grabbing at Donny’s chin hair and tugging on it!
Josh and I spent a very special morning together and let mommy sleep really late. We had a nice nap together yesterday on the couch, I’ll put up pictures of that later. Jess and I cuddled a lot too! We really had a great day together as a family yesterday. That’s probably why today was especially hard to leave for work.